Welcome to Chronocube design

"I sometimes find I'm drifting
Through this life without effect;
I often wonder if I'm truly
Worth what I've been blessed.
I search through days that have been hard,
To try to understand,
The many trials that I have known,
The life that I have had.
You see me in my daily grind,
So confident and strong;
Yet when I am alone, I question
Just where I belong.
I often try too hard I find,
To analyze and guess,
To scrutinize, investigate
My life I will confess.
For somewhere deeper, there must be
Some meaning to this life,
Some way to make a difference,
Give a reason for this strife.
Is there some hidden meaning?
Some agenda to be found?
A greater purpose waiting
If I care to hang around?
It teases and it taunts me,
Always slightly out of sight;
A hazy vision out of reach,
Where darkness hides the light.
I struggle to bring clarity
To what awaits me there,
And yet this weak illusion
Always fades before my stare.
It seems the harder that I try,
To focus through the haze,
Just serves to add more questions,
Through my endless, tired gaze.
Perhaps I'm trying just too hard,
To understand it all,
For can we ever truly know
Just what we have in store?
Each incident, each moment passed,
Just adds upon the next,
But in the end, will I find truth ...
Or will I be perplexed?
Perhaps I make it harder
Than it has to be sometimes,
But will my searching bring to me
My meaning over time?
Or will it leave me broken,
And confused as I feel now,
While questions bring no solitude,
To this, my wrinkled brow.


Kit McCallum

Monday, February 13, 2006

2 disappointment in 3 straight days. Why is that people like to disappoint me? Is it a pleasure to be disappointed?

My best brother of all disappoint me with his O level results. Did badly for them. Now, planning to retake it this year. Same year with the gf. I seriously don't have anything or grudges against her but what happened to your results is partly cos of her. You told me you will not disappoint me and just concentrate on your studies and set aside your heart matters. But I don't see them in you. I felt that you were too involved in your relationship till your studies were abandoned. Still remember how you keep coming to me asking me for help when you had problems with her? It's not that I don't wanna help you in solving it but I felt that you should give your relationship matter a rest and concentrate fully on your O's. Now, everything has floped and you are very devastated by it. I can feel what you're feeling as I've gone through that phase before. Then you are telling me that you'll be retaking your O's and kept assuring me that this time you can do it. I don't know, my dear bro. It's not that I don't believe or trust you but once bitten, twice shy. Furthermore, this year, she'll be doing her O's too. And that means you guys will be seeing each other everyday. Now, tell me. How are you going to divert your attention to studies only? I can only give you moral support and motivation. At the end of the day, IT's ALL UP TO YOU.


Another 'brother'. Another shock. Utterly speechless by her actions. Said something but mean another. Action speaks louder than words ain't it. After all that has been said and done last 2 weeks, you still never change. In front of us, you said this. However, you actually meant something else. Broke my sister's heart just to be with someone whom you've only known for a few pathetic days. Still remember how you PROMISED to me to look after her and not hurt her and stuffs. Now, all your 'so called promises' are actually bullshit which made me believe in them. You are scared to leave her just because you don't want to lose me and your 'daddy'. Hence, you lied saying that, yeah you'll choose my sister instead of that girl. So, what has happened now? After a long talk with my sister and that girl, you finally made your decision and that is to be with that girl. You have yet to tell me about it but I know it from my sister. Even 'daddy' doesn't know anything about it. Cos why? You guys don't want to spoil the fun you guys will be having tomorrow as it's 'daddy's birthday. Imagine what will happen and how will 'daddy' react to it upon knowing everything. I wonder how long are you going to play this game. Not telling me anything and also not telling 'daddy' anything. Sister is now begging me not to disregard you as my brother. Tell me, should I or should I not? You played us around and like a fool we believed you. I got nothing else to say to you. All the best with that new girl of yours.


Funny how complicated love can be. People are willing to do anything for their loved ones. That I don't deny. Sometimes, me too does that. However, when the things they do destroy their loved ones, is it good or bad? Maybe at some point, it is. It all depends on the situation. Things like this make me think twice about going into a relationship, AGAIN.

We know how we feel for each other. But like I told you, it's not you. It's just plain me. Yeah, I know it's not fair not to give others a chance just because we've been hurt once. Took quite some time for me to recover fully, hence I need ample time to accept you. Yes, you said we're not rushing for anything yet. But seeing the way things are now, is like...We ARE already an item when we are actually not. You told me I can just back off but it's not easy to do so once I've fallen inside. I don't enjoy hurting people like what people. Cos I know it seriously sucks. Taking it easy is all we can do now, ain't it.


Aaanyways, though I don't celebrate it, here's wishing everyone out there a very
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!!!!!!! May you savour those special moments with your loved ones. Love them and not hurt them. Till then, take care.


Fullstop at
6:30 PM

[P]rofiles
I never thought I would have a complicated future. Well, I guess that's how life works. Maybe HE has the best answer to it all.

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Khairunnisa
101087
Fickle-head
Hopeless
Vulnerable
Cookie Addict
Heavy Sleeper
Cookie Monster & Spongebob Fan
Huge Procrastinator
Dysfunctional mind
Gastrics=BEST FRIEND

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[E]xits
[Issac]
[Nazurah]
[1/4]
[Khairul]
[Fadzillah]
[2/4]
[Nana]
[Irza]
[Jannah]
[Kak Sally]
[Nana]
[Eddy]
[Hidayah]
[Fariza]
[Aini]
[Syasya]
[Deeyana]
[Yat]
[Muz]
[Syikin]
[Darn]
[T]agging




[C]redits
Design & Concept: ChronoCube
Base Codes: effloresce} & wishix
Font: dafont
Image: ChronoCube
Brushes: Ca-pris
Software Used: Photoshop CS 2 & Dreamweaver 8
[A]rchives
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