Welcome to Chronocube design

"I sometimes find I'm drifting
Through this life without effect;
I often wonder if I'm truly
Worth what I've been blessed.
I search through days that have been hard,
To try to understand,
The many trials that I have known,
The life that I have had.
You see me in my daily grind,
So confident and strong;
Yet when I am alone, I question
Just where I belong.
I often try too hard I find,
To analyze and guess,
To scrutinize, investigate
My life I will confess.
For somewhere deeper, there must be
Some meaning to this life,
Some way to make a difference,
Give a reason for this strife.
Is there some hidden meaning?
Some agenda to be found?
A greater purpose waiting
If I care to hang around?
It teases and it taunts me,
Always slightly out of sight;
A hazy vision out of reach,
Where darkness hides the light.
I struggle to bring clarity
To what awaits me there,
And yet this weak illusion
Always fades before my stare.
It seems the harder that I try,
To focus through the haze,
Just serves to add more questions,
Through my endless, tired gaze.
Perhaps I'm trying just too hard,
To understand it all,
For can we ever truly know
Just what we have in store?
Each incident, each moment passed,
Just adds upon the next,
But in the end, will I find truth ...
Or will I be perplexed?
Perhaps I make it harder
Than it has to be sometimes,
But will my searching bring to me
My meaning over time?
Or will it leave me broken,
And confused as I feel now,
While questions bring no solitude,
To this, my wrinkled brow.


Kit McCallum

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

It doesn't even matter anymore. Certain things are just too hard to handle, much less explain. Whether or not you're home, things don't seem to be of any difference. First, it was only one or 2 days of not talking or seeing each other. Now, it's becoming weeks. It's like as though there's no you anymore in my life. There's just nothing for me to look forward to at home, every single day, be it at night or morning. Most of the time, I'll be alone. Despite having siblings coming back at certain time of the day. Even them. They spend most of their time, over at the other place. So it doesn't matter as to what time I'll reach home or not coming home at all. It's like no one is interested in knowing where I'll be and so on. It's like I'm all alone, in this life. I wonder how long more will this carry on.

We no longer have that long, deep conversation. Even when you're at home, we rarely see each other. You're already sleeping by the time I reach home, or you'll lock yourself in your room. You'll be awake and gone when I just crept to bed. We seem to be drifting further apart. It's like we're becoming strangers. The bond between us ain't there anymore. Tough shit huh.. It's all a world of my own. I make my own decisions, I make my own rules. No doubt it's great, but there's a whole lot more than that. Sometimes, I sympathise with my own condition, but nevertheless, I know there's lots more who are even worse off. Oh well..

Am currently down with fever and bad sore throat. Have become an owl too. Body clock is all jumbled up. Things at work have been fairly good. No doubt there tend to be some scratches, but I guess that's how work life is. I just got to be patient and understand the other party as well. Gotta search for a rather proper job as well. It's time for me to get serious. Not that I'm not serious all along, but maybe more concentration in life. Have to set my priorities right. Gotta throw all those ridiculous feelings and get things straight instead. After all, what goes around comes around. That's what karma's all about. Shall not waste time because of one setback. It's not even worth it.


I will eventually get what's mine, someday. If God's willing.


Fullstop at
10:19 AM

[P]rofiles
I never thought I would have a complicated future. Well, I guess that's how life works. Maybe HE has the best answer to it all.

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Khairunnisa
101087
Fickle-head
Hopeless
Vulnerable
Cookie Addict
Heavy Sleeper
Cookie Monster & Spongebob Fan
Huge Procrastinator
Dysfunctional mind
Gastrics=BEST FRIEND

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[E]xits
[Issac]
[Nazurah]
[1/4]
[Khairul]
[Fadzillah]
[2/4]
[Nana]
[Irza]
[Jannah]
[Kak Sally]
[Nana]
[Eddy]
[Hidayah]
[Fariza]
[Aini]
[Syasya]
[Deeyana]
[Yat]
[Muz]
[Syikin]
[Darn]
[T]agging




[C]redits
Design & Concept: ChronoCube
Base Codes: effloresce} & wishix
Font: dafont
Image: ChronoCube
Brushes: Ca-pris
Software Used: Photoshop CS 2 & Dreamweaver 8
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